Wednesday, November 14, 2007

Recent Annoyances

I usually don't let minor things get to me, but lately, my level of patience has been running low.

First off, spiders- ugh! I know that Simon said spiders are our friends, but not blackwidows (or brown widows- clear brownish spiders with a red mark underneath)! Lately, I've been finding little black widow babies and adults in our pantry and in the rooms that aren't used as often. If anyone remembers the last encounter that Jyoti and I had trying to kill a blackwidow OUTSIDE, you can imagine our reaction to finding the gremlins inside our house (we were not succesful and my brother and mom got a kick out of the whole thing). Side note: If you read anything that tells you blackwidows stay outside residences, do NOT believe it! This is a huge problem- we have three (3) babies at our house- Mira, Buddy, and Amber. If they are bitten, due to their size and weight, it can be very very dangerous. There are two that live in our sliding glass door, right by the doggy-door; once I get the spider-killer, I should be able to spray the cracks and kill them. Yes, I know - it sounds mean, but it's survival of the fittest. I wouldn't kill them if they stayed outside and out of our way.

My solutions: I've done some research and have found a product called Demon WP; it's supposed to be safe for humans and dogs, but I'll have to research some more and make sure. I have also decided to shift stuff around and create some movement every other day or so in those rooms that are unoccupied the majority of the week/month.

Second irritant, horrible drivers that think they own the road! Everybody that drives Page Mill Road in Palo Alto after work knows how long it takes to get from El Camino to 101. When you get closer to the freeway, one lane takes you to the 101 North ramp and the other will take you to 101 South, which is far less congested. The problem is that some people think they are too good to wait in line like everyone else. They drive as far as they can in the lane that takes you to 101 South and then, at the very last minute, slam their brakes and cut into the 101 North lane. UGH. Everyone does this every now and then, but it seems that more and more drivers are doing this on Page Mill- semi drivers, crotch rockets, vans, cars, etc.! It's so rude and inconsiderate. I can only give the benefit of the doubt for so long and for so many people.

Here's another: People taking things for granted and thinking their smallest woes are the end of the world. Even though I have lost someone in my life every other month, since June, I know that my sorrow isn't even close to what the families of those people are feeling. One of the deaths is my grandma, who my dad couldn't say farewell to... and I know that still haunts him. Can we all please just be thankful that we have a job, a family (with all the negatives, looney members, etc.), a car (or some mode of transporation), good health, food for our tummies, etc. My mom is very sick, but I always compare her to my friend's mom who is undergoing chemo., or friend's wife who has battled against cancer for years now, but it keeps coming back. I just have to keep reminding myself that no matter how hard my problems seem, there is always someone who has it much worse.


Last, but not least... moving back home to take care of my mom. Given some of the family history, this might not have been the smartest choice for me. It's definitely not beneficial for me. I'm starting to get the "hero" complex again and with everything else going on, it's starting to wear me down a lot sooner than it usually would. I feel guilty for going to work early and coming home late to avoid seeing my mom so sick. I try to work from home at times, but my mom can be so high maintenance... I am asked to do four (4) things at once- make lunch, laundry, clean, and do my job on top of that. I usually don't complain and I feel bad doing so, but give me a break.

I've been having 18 hour days and it's beginning to catch up. At this point, my daily routies consist of waking up at 4:30 a.m., going to work, getting off at 5 p.m., coming home, medicating mumma, dealing with the aftermath (shivering, shaking, high fever of 103+, chills, tremors, vomitting, etc.), cooking dinner, staying up at night, hearing her throw up all night, taking care of her, going to sleep for a couple of hours and beginning all over again... I have to keep chanting, "I can't fix everything for everyone," over and over again. *long sigh*

All I want is some peace and quiet for my favorite time of the year. That's all :o) I'm done venting. Carry on.